We Move Your Stuff (Eventually)

With 25 years of "experience" and a 67% success rate*, we're definitely in the top 50 container hauliers in the UK**
*Success measured by "containers that arrived somewhere"
**There are only 12 companies in our category

Get A Quote (Warning: May Contain Optimism)

Our "Award-Winning" Services*

*Award given by Gary's mum for "Trying Really Hard"

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Container Haulage

We move containers from Point A to Point B via Point Z, that weird roundabout in Milton Keynes, and Dave's cousin's farm. Our drivers turn 2-hour journeys into spiritual quests lasting several days.

Recent achievement: Found a container we lost in 2019!

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"Express" Delivery

When you absolutely, positively need your container delivered sometime this financial year, trust Gold Star! Our express service is so fast, it sometimes arrives before we even pick it up.

Express = Eventually, right?

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Customer "Service"

Our award-winning* support team will answer your call after only 4-6 attempts! They're trained in advanced deflection techniques and can blame literally anything on "traffic".

*Award for "Most Creative Excuses 2023"

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"Precision" Logistics

Using cutting-edge technology from 2007 and Gary's legendary sense of direction (he once got lost in his own driveway), we guarantee your cargo will arrive somewhere within a 500-mile radius.

Accuracy is overrated anyway

100% Real Customer Reviews*

*Realness not guaranteed

"Gold Star delivered my container only 2 weeks late, which smashed their previous record! The driver apologized by teaching my kids some very colorful new vocabulary. Educational!"

- Sarah, Proud Parent & Logistics Victim

"Their driver got lost for 3 days and ended up in Scotland instead of Slough. On the plus side, he discovered my long-lost brother living in Glasgow. Thanks for the family reunion!"

- Mike, Accidental Family Therapist

"Asked them to deliver to London. They delivered to London, Ontario. In Canada. I mean, they weren't technically wrong, and I got a lovely holiday out of it!"

- Janet, Accidental Tourist

"Gary told me my container was 'definitely somewhere' and that I should 'stop being so needy about knowing where my stuff is.' Refreshingly honest customer service!"

- Bob, Reformed Micromanager

Join Our "Dream Team"

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Gold Star DESPERATELY Needs YOU!

Are you an experienced HGV driver with a passion for adventure and high tolerance for confusion? Can you maintain your sanity while Gary gives you directions drawn on beer mats? Perfect!

What We Offer:

Competitive salary (we compete with unemployment benefits and usually lose)
Guaranteed hours (of confusion and getting lost in industrial estates)
Free therapy (mandatory after month 3)
Career progression (from "lost" to "hopelessly lost" to "Gary's backup")

"Drive with us, not for us" - because we're just as confused as you are about where we're going.

Apply Now (We're Not Picky)